My dear god, it's like my life has him on hold! Whenever I think I'm done with thinking about him, swooning over him or whatever the hell you do when you have a crush on someone - Facebook stalking anyone? - he comes back into my life in the stupidest of ways. For example, by liking my freaking Facebook status.
I feel like a sad excuse for a woman.
And I already felt like that for many other reasons - another time, another blogpost - so this does not help. I am back to staring at the green dot next to his name.
Inner dialogue: "Online!! He is online!! Now let me see if I can get him to talk to me by staring intensely at his name - and GO!"
Did it ever work? No. Will it ever work? Probably not. But I have this insane side to me which looks at everything from the sunny side up. Freaking unicorn babies and pink fluffy clouds surrounded by rainbows sunny side up. My sarcastic side never approves. I feel like a mentally retarded Llama every now and then, but I guess that is just what hormones do to you - they make you loose your sanity.
And again I stop writing early on because I have to go to work in the morning.. I should get better at planning these writing sessions with myself. It's just that I enjoy writing in the evening and I really need my sleep because my days are 11 hours long.. from 8 a.m. in the morning till 7 p.m. I will again be standing on my feet, greeting customers and telling them all about how organic foods are the best thing for your body. And organic cleaning supplies best for nature. And your body. And everything really.
Love,
Anouk
P.S. something I've been wanting for a long time now is a 'stage name'. A name that is not my own, as Anouk is a well known name in the Dutch entertainment industry - there are already so many of us there.. I finally found one that is kind of sticking with me. Noa Lane. I might be using that from now on.
Alternative ending to blogpost:
Love,
Noa
I found this gem om 9gag - accurate
'When you spot your secret crush'
